Apr 16

Moveable Feast

The “moveable feast” that is life is both a blessing and a curse. If we know exactly what was going to occur, then life would be rather dull and pedestrian, however it would be rather nice to know and be able to rely upon things that had been supposedly established and committed to.

I am rather a creature of habit, although I like to think of myself as daring and living life in the moment. The truth is that I rather like the predictable, I enjoy knowing what’s going on, I like facts and to be totally honest I hate surprises even on my birthday or Christmas, well ok they are exceptions but up to a point! Just while we are on the birthday and Christmas point, how many husbands and fathers out there have been told by their wives children or parents that “You are so difficult to buy for?” Why? We are just ordinary blokes and very easy to please. We don’t expect to be thrilled or knocked down with surprise in our case it really is just the thought that counts, although socks, underwear, toblerone or vouchers to “Exclusive Books” does show very little effort.

So back to the topic of a reliable and relatively stable life! Don’t get me wrong I am keener than most when it comes to change, I just like planned change, not last minute changes caused by unexpected issues or factual changes. Yes planned and professional change is healthy and cleansing, in fact without change and progress where would we be, the answer is still in the dark ages. So as we progress and world economics change daily, we must be thankful for the small mercy that is “collective wisdom”.

The world since 2007 has been a challenging and rude economic place. At times it looked as though the ultimate melt down was due at any moment and that every corner we turned could lead us into the abyss that could have taken us decades to escape from. But the world brought together some of its brightest minds those with huge intellect, capable of solving a worldwide financial pandemic. Let’s hope that the bandages and salve these world leaders and bankers have agreed upon, will guide us back to a period of relative stability.

Moving on, I have been so fortunate over the last four months, as a friend has been staying in Hawaii with his two “professional” surfing son, which has allowed me and my loved ones to stay in their Kommetjie home, what a privilege. I have never lived so close to the beach before and it has taught me so much about how much we take for granted in SA. The beach, the water, the waves, even the smell of the kelp (on its worst days Emma our neighbour just smiles and says, “you get used to it”). Stunning sunsets, sunrises, birds (not all feathered), seals, whales, soft sand and peaceful walks, all for free and all on my doorstep for the last 22 years and I was too stupid to experience it.

On another angle, internationalisation what a crock. We have all been sold many advantages of the Chinese and Asians moving “head long” into Africa, what we have been too weak to acknowledge perhaps is what we can lose. Political independence, perhaps, lack of future choice of economic partners, other than the “allocated” Asian option, perhaps. But these types of issue come and go and in a hundred years may even be as historically irrelevant as the last colonial masters.

What cannot, however, EVER be changed is the wiping out of Africa’s endangered species, that impact can never be reversed. So I want to take this chance, maybe my last one ever, to explain to the Asian male the following fact, because it is not complicated. NO amount of Rhino horn will ever make your penis feel any longer or any harder, but Viagra can. What is more, 10 000 bottles of Viagra will cost you one tenth of what you now pay, in bribes alone, to ship our sacred cargo into your country and bathroom, you can even buy Viagra over the counter! And there is more, with regards to my and ever other human beings great friend, the elephant, simply BACK OFF! Go buy some “made in China” plastic ornaments, signature blocks or whatever else it is you think these majestic beasts should die for.

It is depressing enough to know our own government is totally impotent and lame, when it comes to protecting the only reason that global tourism really visits Africa, it’s big game. But to see Asians arrogantly sticking up two fingers to all South Africans and Africans in general, as they slaughter the beasts and buy off the weak, is simply too much!

If China and or any other Asian nation disagree with me, about their complicity in this genocide, then I lay down this challenge; “You have much to gain from Africa, over the next 50 years, so give something tangible back, Donate $1 billion upfront now to a new foundation, run by established and respected animal welfare figures, with the sole task of protecting the rhino and the elephant and hunting down all those who seek to do them any harm”.

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *